Life as a Senior

Life as a senior - not that kind of senior, but a senior at seminary. While we are not too far away from qualifying for the senior discount at most restaurants, it is still a few years away.

Life as a senior at seminary has its own dynamic. It is both joyful (we are almost done) and frustrating (why do we have to come back?). Internship is a taste of what is to come, a chance to see and feel what vocation in Christ's church is really like, then they snatch us back and tell us to spend one more year in the classroom.

Is it the right thing to do? Probably, but I am having a little trouble seeing it, at least so far. The classes we are taking are great - a couple of them are courses I now wish I had been able to take before internship. I suppose that is the biggest point for making us come back - we now see the real value in these courses after internship whereas we probably would not have seen the value before.

Life as a senior in a Lutheran seminary also has its own unique struggles. Part of being a senior also means that there is another process going on at the same time as your classes. This process is called APPROVAL. Approval means writing an essay, meeting with two members of the faculty who point out all of the errors in your essay, and then they send you off to your candidacy committee so they can point out all of the things that they don't understand or agree with (sometimes the same things).

Once you are absolutely certain that you have not learned anything in your 3+ years of seminary, the committee takes a vote. If they vote yes, it means that you have been approved (assuming that you pass your remaining courses at seminary, of course). If they vote no, it either means that they think you need some specific training or that there is a major issue with your formulation of theology.

Fortunately - both of us have been approved. Not that this happened is a stress-free way. Not at all. But even with the stress, there has been affirmation of gifts, of those things that have been learned, and a few pointers at those areas for continued learning.

One of the things I think I have most learned in this time of seminary, and reflection, and interviewing, is that our faith life is a continuing process which never ends. Whether we are called to ordained service, or to wait tables, our faith is always growing, transforming who we are, and how we live. For some, this growth is seen in a more holistic person - a person with character - in all phases of their life. For others, this growth might seem more drastic - like suddenly going off to seminary. Whatever this growth looks like for you, realize that it is growth, that our faith is never stagnant, that our faith journey is just that - a never-ending journey.

This also is true of our learning - especially as pastors-to-be. I will never know the Bible well enough, or theology well enough, or church history well enough - to not continue to study and learn. This might be the biggest revelation of being a senior. When you first begin internship, you wonder if you know enough. As you continue your year in the church, you find out that you remember a lot more of your seminary education than you thought you did. By the end of internship, you feel pretty good about it, but you know that there are a few things you might want to learn a little more about. Then, after the first few weeks of senior classes, you realize that you don't know anything - that internship was full of mistakes that you did not even see, and that this is your last chance to learn from these people who are dedicated to turning out not just pastors, but good and faithful pastors for the church.

So, this is what it is like, being a senior. Ready to go, to be in ministry, but also aware that there is much to learn, and that it will still be that way on graduation day. We will have learned more by then, but also are aware that continuing education is something that we cannot take lightly (and should not take lightly).

And so, on this eve of Thanksgiving eve, these are my thoughts. Being approved this past weekend lightens the burden, but there are still papers to write, forms to fill out, and spring classes to consider. May your faith journey continue, and may your turkey be filling.