Being in ministry (on internship or as a pastor) means that you don’t have Christmas off. On top of the decorating and shopping and baking and sending cards and wrapping gifts, we had many preparations at church. I taught adult Sunday school on the morning of December 24th (we were discussing the birth of Jesus as recorded in the second chapter of Luke); then assisted with worship for the fourth Sunday of Advent. After worship, the sanctuary underwent a transformation from the blue of Advent to the white of Christmas. A busy afternoon followed.
By evening, we were back at church again – to celebrate Christmas with a candlelight communion service. Home then to fix a late supper, finish the laundry, and pack. We left first thing in the morning to travel home to visit family for a few days. On our drive we listened to a variety of Christmas music on the radio. One holiday favorite kept repeating: “I’ll be home for Christmas.” We could identify with those lyrics as we sped along the highway on our way home to spend a week visiting with family and friends.
Before the end of the week arrived, though, I realized that I was ready to be home – back to my own pillow and bed and other familiar surroundings. But just as I said that to Ray, I realized that I wasn’t so sure where home is anymore! We call North Carolina home, but haven’t really lived there in over two years. We have library cards in two major cities, cars registered in two states, phone numbers in three area codes, and belongings in storage in one place and in an apartment over 500 miles away. You could say we have roots in one place, but are roosting in another.
Just as I began to be melancholy about not feeling like I can really call anywhere “home” anymore, I realized that this is a very real part of our seminary education. We haven’t just left behind too much stuff and our ties to one place, but have gained so much more. We have had the opportunity to learn so much, to meet so many people, and worship in so many different congregations and settings. We now have many new friends in several states just because of this amazing journey. We are becoming “at home” in many different places. Something tells me that this is a lesson God needed for us to learn…
I trust that God has a plan which he will reveal to us at just the right moment. Most of all, I know that we always have a home with him. In the meantime, I can’t begin to imagine where the path of this journey leads, but I do know that it felt good to be back in our apartment last night, and to be welcomed “home” by someone at church today!
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News from Ray & Ruth Ann about life at Seminary. This web log was started as we prepared for a trip to Mississippi to spend a month with LDR (Lutheran Disaster Response), and continued when we returned to seminary. The blog went with us on internship, and now has followed us back to seminary for our senior year.
3 comments:
Ruth & Ray -
I knew people who kept a close tie to "home" during seminary -- who went to a seminary/internship all close to home. At the time, I envied them.
Now, I see a real advantage to the feeling of "homelessness" that many of us experience during seminary & on internship: it allows you to adopt your new congregation as home when you get a call. It makes ministry easier if your congregation is home - and even if you aren't overt about it the congregation will know whether you consider it home or if you are just passing through (and which do you think will have more authority & respect in the congregation?).
I know it can make you feel homesick now -- but there is a light at the end of the tunnel.
Since I am on internship in basically my home town, I have a different perspective on what it means to go home.
Our "home" congregation is only a few miles from our house, but we have not worshipped there in a very long time. Angela and the kids still frequent the church where I did my field work, but I am here at my internship site nearly every day.
I hear the stories from our "other two churches," but I rarely if ever get to speak with our friends. But here in this place I have made so many new friends, and this congregation, for me is "home."
I am very much engaged in the life of St. Luke's. So much so that I really have no time, or desire for that matter, to go "home." Even my children don't feel the need to go back. We have made that split and now are looking forward to the unknown, knowing that God will lead us to the place we can call home.
Fortunately, we've been able to visit our 'home' congregation once or twice a year, to maintain a connection with the community and stay in touch with friends.
But really, I haven't felt homesick or sad as much as I have been able to step back and realize just how important this transition is for us.
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